How the Last Episode of "This Is Us" Finally Broke Me

Image source: Glamour

Image source: Glamour

::SPOILER ALERTS AHEAD::

I normally avoid overly emotionally dramas. Especially since my father died. But I came for Sterling K. Brown and stayed for pretty much everyone else on the show. Unless you live under a rock you may not have heard of This Is Us. The show is a bought a set of triplets, well, a set of twins and the parents adopt a third when they lose their third child during labor. When I heard about the premise I thought I wasn't going to be able to handle it. Not to sound cynical but I thought it's going to be sad and it's going to be cheesy. The first episode I thought, oh great, there is a slightly slower Gilmore Girls dialogue. Only West Wing and Gilmore Girls can pull this off. But then Milo Ventimiglia is in it. I love him. He has one of the best Instagram profile's by the way, worth checking out, I wish he kept posting! Ron Cephas Jones seems like he has been in everything lately and he's a scene stealer. So I stick around...oh snap, who is that?! Justin Hartley, um yeah, I'll give it a few episodes. 

The pilot was a little cheesy until the end and after a few episodes I was hooked. There were a lot of things I could be doing but instead I binged and now I'm caught up. I was so impressed with myself for not crying and just taking the show in. I definitely could relate to Kate, Chrissy Metz's character. Those days when I stopped at a gas station, eating a hostess snack, and wanting to cry, yeah, been there. Now I totally want to go to a wellness camp. But I didn't cry.

But then the "Memphis" episode aired and I lost it. I knew the death of Randall's father, William, was imminent. The show doesn't make a secret of it but it still hit me hard. It was one of the most beautiful story arcs I've ever seen. Showing his anger for leaving him, getting to know him, and losing him in such a short amount of time was well done and it brought out a lot of emotions for me. Losing my father in an instant a year and a half ago it hit me hard. In the show William loved music. That's what makes it hard for me almost daily, my father's love of music. For a long time I would only listen to top 40 just because I didn't want to hear a song my dad liked. Then I went to the opposite end and only listened to music he liked just so I could feel close to him. Eventually I got back to that balance but the funniest and most random songs can trigger my emotions. But now I don't cry whenever I hear The Isley Brothers, Tears for Fears, that one Drake song he loved, or "West End Girls" by The Pet Shop Boys. Watching a show like This Is Us can be hard because it brings up a lot of emotions. But I'm going to stick around because no matter what the characters go through, it is a reminder I have friends, family, work, and to use the memories and lessons from those I lost to keep me going on this journey while I'm still here.